2015, A Year of His Presence

I always like to look back at the end of a year and try to sum it up somehow, so that I can remember. I'll journal about the highlights of the year, things that were important that happened, things that weren't so great that happened, etc. This year, I'm not going to journal about the things that happened or the things that I want to remember. I mainly want to remember one thing about this year. It was a year where I experienced the presence of the Lord like never before. It was a year of big changes, challenges, emotional struggles and quite frankly I wouldn't want to do most of it all over again. But it was a year of His Presence. It was a year of His faithfulness. And for those things, I wouldn't trade it for the world.
I was reading back to a journal entry that I wrote in May of this year. I was having a rough morning and God brought to mind the story of the woman that touched the hem of Jesus' garment and was healed. The particular thing that stuck out to me that morning in that story wasn't the healing. It was the pushing through the crowd part. That woman was desperate for a touch from the Lord. She fought through a crowd to just get a glimpse of him. She knew if she could just touch the hem of his robe, she would be changed.
I wrote in my journal this:
When we push through circumstances, we experience breakthrough. But: the breakthrough isn't the reward. His presence is. Pushing through those circumstances takes a lot of effort. You want to give up. I know I have. But it's worth the effort. The reward is priceless. It's incomparable. It's precious. His presence is ALWAYS the BEST REWARD. The healing isn't the reward. The provision isn't the reward. The answer to prayer isn't the reward. His presence is.

I've pushed through this year. There have been tears. There have been moments when I wanted to give up. There were private pains that were only shared with the Lord. There were moments of intense power struggles. Oh but his presence was my reward.