Have you ever had one of those days where you just feel down on yourself? You wonder how on earth anyone ever could or would ever choose to love you? I have days like those sometimes. Maybe that isn't normal... but I'm not really normal anyway.
Today was one of those days. Sometimes when I think about my character flaws and my shortcomings, I really wonder how on earth anyone could love me. I wonder why God would choose me to be his daughter. Why he would ever even want me.
So as I was asking Him this today, I was reminded of what His love really is like.
Romans 8:31-39 The Message
"So what do you think? with God on our side, how can we lose? If God didn't hesitate to put everything on the line for us, embracing our condition and exposing himself to the worst by sending his own Son, is there anything else he wouldn't glady and freely do for us? And who would dare tangle with God by messing with one of God's chosen? Who would dare even point a finger? The One who died for us- who was raised to life for us! is in the presence of God at this very moment sticking up for us. Do you think anyone is going to be able to drive a wedge between us and Christ's love for us? There is no way! Not trouble, not hard times, not hatred, not hunger, not homelessness, not bullying threats, not backstabbing, not even the worst sins listed in Scripture. None of thise faces us because Jesus loves us. I am absolutely convinced that nothing- nothing living or dead, angelic or demonic, today or tomorrow, high or low, thinkable or unthinkable, absolutely nothing can get between us and God's love because of the way that Jesus our Master has embraced us."
I really don't understand that kind of love. I don't have children yet. I hope to one day, but I think that hinders me from understanding the love that God has for me, for us. To think that the love that a parent has for their child doesn't even begin to compare to the love that God has for me. I don't understand why He loves me, but his Word says He does. And I have to believe that. I have to believe that He loves me with a crazy love that isn't fazed by any sins I have ever committed or ever will commit. It isn't fazed by my character flaws. It isn't fazed by my lack of trust and faith some days. And He is always going to want me no matter what. It's crazy but I'm so glad He loves me like that.
Wednesday, July 13, 2011
Thursday, July 7, 2011
The Power of Community
What is Community? What does that word even mean? There is a tv show called Community, but that isn't the community I am talking about. The dictionary says it means "fellowship or organized society". Wikipedia says it means people interacting with common values. That is probably is closer to what I think it means than what the dictionary says.
Over the past 5 years of my life, I have begun to learn what community means. I have learned that through relationships, through small groups at my church, through miscommunications, through arguments, through intense discussions, through differing of opinions, through triumphs shared, through periods of defeat, and through times of absolute joy. I think very few people, especially believers understand what community really means.
Community is not people getting together to sing songs at church or listen to a preacher or sit in a room and listen to somebody teach you about God. While those things are all great, that is not community.
I believe community is about relationships. It really all boils down to that. Our small group just finished up a book called "Groups: the Life Giving Power of Community" by John Ortberg and I really think this guy gets it. I learned so much from that book, but even more from discussing things of importance with people in my group, some of which were strangers to me at the beginning. There were times where we disagreed about things. But then there were times where people cried sharing about their struggles and we all came together with words of understanding and encouragement. That is what community is about. It is about people coming together, determined to really know one another( and I mean REALLY KNOW ONE ANOTHER)..... it is about finding a common ground even when you might not agree on everything, it is about loving each other even though we all are not really easy to love, it is about forgiving past mistakes and moving on.
If churches would really experience community, everyone would want to be a part of it. People long for that intimacy with one another. They long to be known and still be accepted in spite of their flaws. People need to have support. Real support.
In Acts 2 towards the end, it talks about real community. How the believers came together and lived together in harmony and had everything in common. They pooled all their resources and gave to people that were in need. Then it says that people saw that and wanted to be a part of it.
It is amazing to me how a group of strangers can come together and what God can do in the middle of it. People that I didn't know very well at all that I would do anything to protect now....People that I pray for daily and I know they pray for me too. People that I am proud to call my friends.
That is what community is and I am so honored to get to be a part of a community like that.
Over the past 5 years of my life, I have begun to learn what community means. I have learned that through relationships, through small groups at my church, through miscommunications, through arguments, through intense discussions, through differing of opinions, through triumphs shared, through periods of defeat, and through times of absolute joy. I think very few people, especially believers understand what community really means.
Community is not people getting together to sing songs at church or listen to a preacher or sit in a room and listen to somebody teach you about God. While those things are all great, that is not community.
I believe community is about relationships. It really all boils down to that. Our small group just finished up a book called "Groups: the Life Giving Power of Community" by John Ortberg and I really think this guy gets it. I learned so much from that book, but even more from discussing things of importance with people in my group, some of which were strangers to me at the beginning. There were times where we disagreed about things. But then there were times where people cried sharing about their struggles and we all came together with words of understanding and encouragement. That is what community is about. It is about people coming together, determined to really know one another( and I mean REALLY KNOW ONE ANOTHER)..... it is about finding a common ground even when you might not agree on everything, it is about loving each other even though we all are not really easy to love, it is about forgiving past mistakes and moving on.
If churches would really experience community, everyone would want to be a part of it. People long for that intimacy with one another. They long to be known and still be accepted in spite of their flaws. People need to have support. Real support.
In Acts 2 towards the end, it talks about real community. How the believers came together and lived together in harmony and had everything in common. They pooled all their resources and gave to people that were in need. Then it says that people saw that and wanted to be a part of it.
It is amazing to me how a group of strangers can come together and what God can do in the middle of it. People that I didn't know very well at all that I would do anything to protect now....People that I pray for daily and I know they pray for me too. People that I am proud to call my friends.
That is what community is and I am so honored to get to be a part of a community like that.
Thursday, June 30, 2011
Slaves No Longer
I was at the gym this afternoon and I like to listen to worship music when I workout. (Although sometimes it is sooo hard for me not to sing out loud in the middle of the gym!) Today was one of those days... a song came on my ipod that I have listened to bunches of times but it spoke really loudly to me this afternoon. It talks about how Christ has opened blinded eyes to see, that He has set the captives free and it got me to thinking... We as believers really forget that. That we aren't captives anymore. I think we really forget that we aren't slaves to sin any longer. When He came, he came for our freedom. Yet we sit in the middle of our sins and struggles and our chains like we haven't been given our freedom yet. But if we are believers, He has already set us free! We have been granted our freedom and our lives don't look like it.
I will be really transparent in this blog. I have been struggling with bitterness in my life. And I've been begging God to help me, to take it away, to give me a loving heart. And when I heard this song today, I literally heard God say to me.." Lori, you are already free. I bought you with a price. You aren't a slave to this. Let it go."
It was like the heavens had opened in the middle of the gym.
So I came home and looked up some verses about freedom and I wanted to share them.
Psalm 34:22 "God pays for each slave's freedom, no one who runs to him loses out."
Romans 6:14" Sin can't tell you how to live. After all, you're not living under that old tyranny any longer. You're living in the freedom of God."
I love that.. sin can't tell me how to live! I'm living in the freedom of God.
Let this be a reminder to you..whatever you're dealing with.. being prideful, being envious, lust, bitterness, not being content with your life, whatever.......you don't have to stay chained to it. You've already been set free. Just get up and walk away. Sin can't tell you how to live anymore. And if you run to Him, you won't lose out. Those are promises straight from His Word.
Here is a link to the song "God of the Redeemed"
I will be really transparent in this blog. I have been struggling with bitterness in my life. And I've been begging God to help me, to take it away, to give me a loving heart. And when I heard this song today, I literally heard God say to me.." Lori, you are already free. I bought you with a price. You aren't a slave to this. Let it go."
It was like the heavens had opened in the middle of the gym.
So I came home and looked up some verses about freedom and I wanted to share them.
Psalm 34:22 "God pays for each slave's freedom, no one who runs to him loses out."
Romans 6:14" Sin can't tell you how to live. After all, you're not living under that old tyranny any longer. You're living in the freedom of God."
I love that.. sin can't tell me how to live! I'm living in the freedom of God.
Let this be a reminder to you..whatever you're dealing with.. being prideful, being envious, lust, bitterness, not being content with your life, whatever.......you don't have to stay chained to it. You've already been set free. Just get up and walk away. Sin can't tell you how to live anymore. And if you run to Him, you won't lose out. Those are promises straight from His Word.
Here is a link to the song "God of the Redeemed"
Monday, June 20, 2011
A little perspective
When I think about relationships, at least relationships in my life, the word "jaded" comes to mind. I don't think you can deal with people, friends, etc. for very long without becoming somewhat jaded. People are human and are flawed and therefore they disappoint you. I can promise you if you are in a relationship with a person, you WILL be disappointed in some capacity.
In the past, I have dealt with my disappointments in people in various ways. I have gotten hurt and continued to let that person hurt me over and over again without standing up for myself. I have gone to the other extreme and completely shut down to new friendships and relationships. And then through some life experience, soul-searching, and wisdom from others, I now find myself in a place of happy-medium.
This past semester, I did a psychiatric rotation for nursing school and I had the priviledge of sitting through some incredible group therapy sessions. In those group therapy sessions, I met and listened to flawed people. People that had abused drugs and their families. People who had been abused by family members and close friends. People with addictions. People with anger issues. What I learned in those sessions is that I am not really that different from "those" people. I have my own insecurities. My past experiences have shaped me just like their experiences have shaped them.
What I gained out of those sessions was some understanding. Some perspective. That we all have our issues. We all disappoint people on some level. We all are flawed.
So this past week when I found myself feeling disappointed by someone, I had to take the time to remember that this person had their reasons for being the way they are. This person is flawed and so am I.
A little perspective can go a long way. Relationships are hard. But if we remember we all are flawed people, it becomes much easier to make allowances for others. It is hard to put yourself out there and know you will be disappointed or hurt by someone, but relationships are worth the risk, worth the hurt, worth the growing pains. We were created to be known, for relationships, to connect.
In the past, I have dealt with my disappointments in people in various ways. I have gotten hurt and continued to let that person hurt me over and over again without standing up for myself. I have gone to the other extreme and completely shut down to new friendships and relationships. And then through some life experience, soul-searching, and wisdom from others, I now find myself in a place of happy-medium.
This past semester, I did a psychiatric rotation for nursing school and I had the priviledge of sitting through some incredible group therapy sessions. In those group therapy sessions, I met and listened to flawed people. People that had abused drugs and their families. People who had been abused by family members and close friends. People with addictions. People with anger issues. What I learned in those sessions is that I am not really that different from "those" people. I have my own insecurities. My past experiences have shaped me just like their experiences have shaped them.
What I gained out of those sessions was some understanding. Some perspective. That we all have our issues. We all disappoint people on some level. We all are flawed.
So this past week when I found myself feeling disappointed by someone, I had to take the time to remember that this person had their reasons for being the way they are. This person is flawed and so am I.
A little perspective can go a long way. Relationships are hard. But if we remember we all are flawed people, it becomes much easier to make allowances for others. It is hard to put yourself out there and know you will be disappointed or hurt by someone, but relationships are worth the risk, worth the hurt, worth the growing pains. We were created to be known, for relationships, to connect.
Saturday, June 4, 2011
A Fragrant Life
I love things that smell good. Perfume, flowers, a clean house, freshly folded laundry, the smell of fall in the air. It's funny how sometimes you smell a particular smell and it brings back a memory just as sure as you were standing in that very place again. Sometimes things smell really bad. I work in a hospital and I smell some really horrible smells. Things that I won't go into detail about. :)
In my life, I have been told that my attitude stinks. I think probably at one time or another we all have been told that. If we haven't been told that, someone has probably thought it about us. I know I have been around people who's attitude stinks. It isn't pleasant. It really is like a bad smell that infects the air around them. It affects the attitudes of the people around them.
As believers, we have a smell. The Bible actually says so. In 2 Corinthians 2:14 "Through us, he brings knowledge of Christ. Everywhere we go, people breathe in the exquisite fragrance."
Do our lives smell exquisite? I hope mine does. Sometimes it stinks but I really hope that sometimes it smells good to the people around me.
In my life, I have been told that my attitude stinks. I think probably at one time or another we all have been told that. If we haven't been told that, someone has probably thought it about us. I know I have been around people who's attitude stinks. It isn't pleasant. It really is like a bad smell that infects the air around them. It affects the attitudes of the people around them.
As believers, we have a smell. The Bible actually says so. In 2 Corinthians 2:14 "Through us, he brings knowledge of Christ. Everywhere we go, people breathe in the exquisite fragrance."
Do our lives smell exquisite? I hope mine does. Sometimes it stinks but I really hope that sometimes it smells good to the people around me.
Thursday, June 2, 2011
The Broken are Beautiful
I have broken several bones in my life. I broke my wrist in 4th grade walking.. yes.. that's right. walking. I tripped over my feet, fell, and broke my wrist. You are probably wondering why on earth I would admit to that?? I also broke my right foot in a golf cart accident on my 19th birthday. Then I broke my left ankle playing kickball with some youth. Then the following summer, I broke my right foot again falling down the stairs. I am a very clumsy girl. And it's sort of embarrassing.
What I have learned by all these accidents and broken bones, is that it hurts. When you break a bone it is really quite painful. Even after it heals, sometimes that bone aches.
I think our lives are alot like that. We make choices that leave us broken. Sometimes life just leaves us broken, circumstances leave us broken. And it hurts. We are left with a lot of hurt. And when we are sitting in the middle of that hurt, we can't see anything good that could ever come out of that situation. But I think that when God looks at us in our broken state, He sees something beautiful. When we are strong, we don't realize our need for Him. When things in life are going great, we think we can make it on our own. But when we are broken and weak, we are desperate for Him. I can think of many times in my life when I really thought my life was over, that nothing good would ever happen to me again (sounds dramatic right??). Guess what? I was wrong. God had plans for me all along. He still does. He still has plans for me. And in my brokenness, in my weakness,He orchestrates those plans because my self isn't getting in the way anymore.
Psalm 51:17 "The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God you will not despise."
He loves a broken spirit because it has a desperate need for him.
He comes to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives, to release prisoners from the darkness, to give comfort to those who mourn, to make beauty out of the ashes of our lives...(Isaiah 61)
God can turn the brokenness of our lives into something extraordinarily beautiful if we just let him.
What I have learned by all these accidents and broken bones, is that it hurts. When you break a bone it is really quite painful. Even after it heals, sometimes that bone aches.
I think our lives are alot like that. We make choices that leave us broken. Sometimes life just leaves us broken, circumstances leave us broken. And it hurts. We are left with a lot of hurt. And when we are sitting in the middle of that hurt, we can't see anything good that could ever come out of that situation. But I think that when God looks at us in our broken state, He sees something beautiful. When we are strong, we don't realize our need for Him. When things in life are going great, we think we can make it on our own. But when we are broken and weak, we are desperate for Him. I can think of many times in my life when I really thought my life was over, that nothing good would ever happen to me again (sounds dramatic right??). Guess what? I was wrong. God had plans for me all along. He still does. He still has plans for me. And in my brokenness, in my weakness,He orchestrates those plans because my self isn't getting in the way anymore.
Psalm 51:17 "The sacrifices of God are a broken spirit; a broken and contrite heart, O God you will not despise."
He loves a broken spirit because it has a desperate need for him.
He comes to bind up the brokenhearted, to proclaim freedom for the captives, to release prisoners from the darkness, to give comfort to those who mourn, to make beauty out of the ashes of our lives...(Isaiah 61)
God can turn the brokenness of our lives into something extraordinarily beautiful if we just let him.
Friday, May 13, 2011
A Grace Given Without Restraint
I am overwhelmed daily by the grace of God in my life. It is hard for me to understand sometimes , well a lot of times, why he would want a relationship with me. The grace of God is something I think few people understand. It is something that you have to truly experience to understand it, and even then I think we can’t really completely comprehend the depth of the grace that He freely gives us. I was talking with a friend today about guilt and shame over past mistakes and I was struck again by how little I understand the grace of God. I think if we really understood it, guilt and shame wouldn’t be present in our lives after true repentance. So, after that conversation, I went digging in the word of God to find some understanding.
I came across Psalm 103, which is one of my very favorite psalms.
8 The LORD is merciful and gracious;
he is slow to get angry and full of unfailing love.
9 He will not constantly accuse us,
nor remain angry forever.
10 He has not punished us for all our sins,
nor does he deal with us as we deserve.
11 For his unfailing love toward those who fear him
is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth.
12 He has removed our rebellious acts
as far away from us as the east is from the west.
13 The LORD is like a father to his children,
tender and compassionate to those who fear him.
14 For he understands how weak we are;
he knows we are only dust.
These verses spoke to my heart in a new, fresh way today. This is what grace is all about. He doesn’t constantly accuse us. He doesn’t remain angry forever when we mess up. He hasn’t punished us for everything wrong we’ve ever done, and he certainly doesn’t give us what we deserve. He removes our sins so far away, you can’t find them anymore. He treats us like a father treats his children, tender and compassionate. And the very best part to me today was… He UNDERSTANDS how weak we are because he knows we are only dust. .. He knows we are only human. He knows we are going to fail him over and over and over and over again. And yet he still loves us. He still chooses to forgive.
That is what grace is. We don’t understand it, because we don’t give grace the way He does. But it is so amazing to know that He gives it to us without restraint.
I came across Psalm 103, which is one of my very favorite psalms.
8 The LORD is merciful and gracious;
he is slow to get angry and full of unfailing love.
9 He will not constantly accuse us,
nor remain angry forever.
10 He has not punished us for all our sins,
nor does he deal with us as we deserve.
11 For his unfailing love toward those who fear him
is as great as the height of the heavens above the earth.
12 He has removed our rebellious acts
as far away from us as the east is from the west.
13 The LORD is like a father to his children,
tender and compassionate to those who fear him.
14 For he understands how weak we are;
he knows we are only dust.
These verses spoke to my heart in a new, fresh way today. This is what grace is all about. He doesn’t constantly accuse us. He doesn’t remain angry forever when we mess up. He hasn’t punished us for everything wrong we’ve ever done, and he certainly doesn’t give us what we deserve. He removes our sins so far away, you can’t find them anymore. He treats us like a father treats his children, tender and compassionate. And the very best part to me today was… He UNDERSTANDS how weak we are because he knows we are only dust. .. He knows we are only human. He knows we are going to fail him over and over and over and over again. And yet he still loves us. He still chooses to forgive.
That is what grace is. We don’t understand it, because we don’t give grace the way He does. But it is so amazing to know that He gives it to us without restraint.
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